The Pursuit of Fulfillment

So as some of you might have noticed, I have been quite busy lately! Just trying to get my life together. These past few weeks have been a series of huge ups (and not necessarily downs), and serious reflection. At times, its easier to keep busy, rather than to contemplate about life ;). This post is going to be a bit of a tangent, so bear with me…I have a lot going on and I want to release it!

I have high standards. But damn my friends have a ridiculous amount of faith in me, which results in at times,what it feels like, infeasable results. However, its a refreshing to know that they believe in me, and my abilities. Though its a bit overwhelming, I feel good when they do push me. Ohh the pressure to excel. I’m just scared that I won’t meet their expectations. Again, this goes back to my post about overbearing feelings: The War Zone. On one hand I want to continue proving them right, by pushing myself, and on the other hand, I just want to show that I struggle as well, even if its in a different way. SOMETIMES ALL I WANT IS A HUG! …and none of those crappy side hugs, I only befriend people who give real, teddy bear-like hugs.

Sometimes life is like a tide. Extremely overwhelming, and full of emotion. But at the end of the day, its how you interpret the situation. Did it come in and destroy, or has it given you the opportunity to rebuild yourself, even stronger? Did it give you the strength reach out your hand to help another, when you wouldn’t have done so previously?

As I was training the other day one of my buddies said “Life is a series of failures.” Part of me agreed, but I cringed at the word failure. So, being the damn optimist that I am, I challenged him. But, I couldn’t really give a good answer on what my definition of success is. He proceeded with:

“What, are you comfortable with your desk job??”

It kind of offended me a tiny bit, at first. How dare he say that when he knows I’m always trying to better myself! There’s more to life than just work! Hahaha. Anyways, I’ll probably never be truly content, but some people may be perfectly fine/blessed with having a desk job. What if I were one of those people? I would be even more offended! Of course all this occurred to me in the shower…after the fact…as always :p So, what DO I define as success?

For me, the definition of success varies among different individuals.

I believe that success is being the strongest version of yourself as possible. And I believe that success is shaping your life for the betterment of society, always sacrificing yourself to help others. I want to have the ability to enter into someone’s life at any given moment, and touch them in a positive way. Whether only for a moment, or befriending them for their entire life.

I am only 24 years young, I haven’t even begun to grasp the struggles and responsibilities that many have to bear. The importance of caring for a child. The struggles of scrounging for every penny to pay for a mortgage. The horribly crippling feeling of losing someone you love. The quest of happiness and success is a long and never ending road. But I do know, at least for me, that happiness comes in the simplest of forms. Pure feelings, and human emotion. In other words, that warm, fuzzy feeling. πŸ˜‰

I’m uncertain about how to go about the next phases of my life…all I know is I have to keep moving forward. Which is, many times, the hardest part.

What have you all been up to lately? My fellow Martial Arts enthusiasts, athletes, and optimists? Do you have any wise words of wisdom for me through these times?


17 thoughts on “The Pursuit of Fulfillment

  1. If I could give you one piece of advice it would be to do what makes YOU happy. If you do that, you will always be successful. I am 35 and it has taken me this long to realize that. Sappy but very true.

    • Thank you, dear! I absolutely agree. I also figure if I’m happy, nothing can go wrong? Right? Hopefully? πŸ˜›

      My friends and family make me happy. I guess its a little harder for me to think about what I can do to make myself happy…if that makes sense?

      • I totally understand. My family is my world. Without them nothing else matters – so that is how I guage what I want. We sometimes make it harder than it has to be. Just remember this rule of thumb….if it makes you happy, then do it. If it doesn’t, then don’t. πŸ™‚ You are a smart cookie, you’ll figure it out. πŸ˜€

  2. An uplifting entry. πŸ™‚ You asked a very poignant question – “Did it come in and destroy, or has it given you the opportunity to rebuild yourself, even stronger?” It all depends how we look at it, isn’t it? You can always find an opportunity, even within the worst of situations, to either better yourself or someone else or something else. Sometimes you have to dig deep, sometimes it’s right in front of your face – either way, even the negative situations have silver linings if we are willing to look for it.

    I enjoy your writing. There is a sort of simplicity in the way you express your feelings and thoughts that is very refreshing. πŸ™‚

    Your “24 years young” line reminded me a lot of what I said on my blog about being 29 years young!

    • Thank you so much for your comment! Made my day a little brighter πŸ™‚ I think I write the way I speak, or so people say πŸ˜› I’m glad you like it, I definitely enjoy your writing as well. When you were in your mid 20’s did you have this feeling too? Its just very overwhelming to look ahead at life, and at the same time focus on the present. In my mind, focusing in the “now” is something that a lot of people forget about. I try my best to enjoy life, yet balancing career is also extremely important to me!

      I do like that term “___ years young ;)” My parents always say “A little over 30 ;)” though they are WELL over 30. I think its cute.:D

      • That feeling (of being overwhelmed with learning from the past, living in the present, and also planning for the future) isn’t just there in the 20s. It continues throughout your journey. Striking a balance is hard, but keep striving for it. πŸ™‚

        “A little over 30” – that IS cute!

  3. You changed the title of your post? It’s funny cause I just wrote a post on expectations tonight too. If someone was perfectly happy with their desk job I don’t think they would be offended by anything anyone had to say about it. It’s true though if you just do whatever your heart wants you won’t be disappointed. Sounds cliche, I know. The hard part is finding that something. Never surround yourself regularly with people who are not like minded. That was my biggest mistake I think. I was better off being alone.

    • Hey Mindo! I did change it, I felt that “expectations” is a bit of a broad term, one of which I would like to write more about in the future! You know what? Some cliches ARE true, no matter how corny they may be πŸ˜›

      I’m actually surrounded by very extraordinary people. The problem with me is that I have issues opening up. I’m not sure what it is…possibly because I don’t like feeling judged? I feel a bit vulnerable when opening up! Its much, much easier to be happy all the time. :p Eh, not very sure. Anyways, I find myself listening to people rather than expressing myself. Something that I’m working on πŸ˜‰

      Thanks for stopping by,I’ll definitely check out your post as well! πŸ™‚

  4. Wow, what a post! So much of this I needed to hear/read. I’m working my way through a lot of personal and professional stress, and I really felt I was going to go under. I try to keep the same mentality that you mentioned: forward, always forward, one foot in front of the other but FORWARD! And your words about how to interpret the situation really struck home. Optimism is not always the easiest thing for me, but I’m getting better about it. But I need to keep in mind that there is always a better way to interpret the situation–like with my car breaking down–it became funny realizing that it was nothing but a break down when it could have been so much worse. I just need to apply that mentality to the other overwhelming things in my life right now, both in and out of work. Thank you so much for this post!

    • Hi Gypsy!

      Thank you so much for dropping by πŸ™‚ I definitely enjoyed your post about your car–it really does seem like you have the right mindset already! Just keep it up πŸ˜‰ Though it’s always nice to have a support group!!

      I really hope things start to pick for you and your work life. I need to step it up in that area, as well πŸ˜‰ Lets do this together!!

  5. Getting used to a new semester, being split among three different campuses, housesitting for mom while she’s visiting relatives, and avoiding the flu at all costs. Watch out for the coughers!

    • Hey Prototype,

      It sure sounds like you’ve been crazy busy!! How’s the new semester treating you? Are you someone with different majors/minors to be split among the 3 campuses?

      Oh, you have no clue, I’ve been avoiding sick people like they have the plague! Ain’t no time for getting sick. πŸ˜‰

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