Modestly Confident

What’s the line between modesty and confidence?? I seem to struggle with this quite a bit without realizing it until someone underestimates me. It makes me think about my approach to things that I’m decent at. Can one ever to -too- modest? I think so. I often forget that many people around us don’t judge by actions, but by what they hear. Not by what they see, but what they want to see. Does that make sense? In this respect, I’m probably a crap martial artist who doesn’t believe that black belts mean anything but how much commitment/what the person wants it to mean (to the average person they’ll probably be like “wtf is this girl saying?”). That I really suck at Basketball/can’t dribble/can’t do layups. My drumming needs work because I haven’t played for a while. Oh- and that I can’t really hold my liquor very well because I don’t like feeling full. Wowww, I really am quiteeee an extraordinary being, huh?! Who wouldn’t want some of this?? :p

I’m writing this just to remind myself that its okay to be confident in your ability. I shouldn’t shy away from the things that I’m passionate about. I shouldn’t be afraid to say that I’m (wow this feels really weird to even type this) good at certain things. Strangers, and even friends sometimes forget that I can hold my own. That I’ve grown every single year, and day for that matter. When I sit here a little frustrated about why certain people underestimate my abilities, I can’t help but think that its not their fault for thinking that way. Its what I’m telling them, and the way I’m telling them that forms their opinion of me. I don’t want to just be “nice” in the eyes of my peers.

Though I’m confident enough in myself to brush off what most people think of me, this post will be the first step towards a more confident sounding Kristin. Sometimes you only get one shot, one sentence, or even one look to make a positive impression on someone else. I want to create an energy that can be seen, heard, and felt. I’m not sure if I can ever accomplish that, but I’ve certainly met a hand full of people with such a presence, so I know its possible! …lets aim for a modestly confident Kristin 😉

Hahaha. So what do you think is the line between modesty and confidence? When does one start to sound cocky? I’m really interested in hearing your thoughts! And I also apologize from being MIA, big things are happening in the world of Kristin! 🙂

Underdog

I’ve always been an underdog, ever since I came out of the womb. Its so weird hearing from my mom that I was born premature, in an incubator, weighing in at ~4 lbs. A fighter I was, and a fighter I’ll always be. You see, life is quite funny. When you look back you can look and see who had faith in you, and saw your potential, and those who underestimate you. Sadly, I had to drive myself to do most of the things I love. Support from my parents was never really there. It really sucked, actually. When you’re young you rely a lot on your parents to give you some guidance. But everyone has their story, right? I think I turned out all right for the most part. :p

That brings me to another point. My friend and I were talking about underdogs the other day, and she mentioned that she and I are underdogs in different ways. It makes sense. We’re pretty much young guns in our industry, just trying to do the best we can do with what we’re given. I personally like climbing the ladder. I’m not sure what it is. Something about proving to others I can do it? Possibly. I think its more about gaining the respect of others around me. Respect, unlike power can only be earned by jumping through fire with your peers.

Here’s a vid that I really enjoyed. The Last Pick – Jeremy Lin